It seems like it was a very defensive reaction toward a direct danger.
If it is still haunting yourself after all this time, it might be best to talk about it with a professional.

Lucky you didn't kill him or you would've been in much more problems.

Hurting others, even defensive does make other peeps wary off you and scared. As they might expect it will happen to them some day. And your attack didn't seem normal to them so they do like they call all unknown scary things, monster.

2 more years and you will most likely graduate and switch schools and can start afresh.
people remember bad things, not good things. remember that.

all my life people has eather been scared of me, or liked to bully me. i have ben called a whole lot of names. but the one that has always clung onto me is when people scream and run away from me yelling that "here comes the monster! run!" thing. it all started with the monster one when i was getting beat infront of everyone by someone who was taking advantige of me for 6 months every day in a row all day long, then pulled a gun on me at his house pecause i refused to bow to him. the next day he started beating me, something inside felt like it cracked. i litteraly attaked him like a hellhound would. ripping at his arms with my sharp teeth and nails, then prouncing on him to the point he fell on the wood gym floor and i got on him and took his throught in between my jaws like i would do to my pray, and locked on with so much to the point 3 of his friends had to all try to get me off him. through the whole insident it felt like i wasnt the one controling me. it felt like i was on a ride. it scared everyone there, and even to this day 5 years later still makes even me scared of my self. idk why that happened... but i was trying to defind myself. i know that. but it still haunts me knowing that if they didnt get me off him 30 seconds later, he would have stoped breathing... is this normal to have defencive systums like this?? it scares me mostly that i could have killed him, and i couldent stop what was happining... is there anything i can do to stop this from happining again, or should i even be worried about it?? it's scarry...

I am not a big fan of negativity spreading, so usually my thoughts are never getting voiced. It's OK to have another opinion, it's OK to respect the opinion of others. I'll try to understand other's opinions, I think it can come after some time. Some therians want to be realistic, some want to be positive ( it's usually equal to being naïve), and it's OK too. The worst we can do is pointing out our differences and try to deal with them. I don't think that community have tendency to change in a big way. If you are looking for another community and you don’t like this one, good luck with that! We can see opportunities of the community we’re in and avoid unpleasant things, or abstract from them.I am just sharing my thoughts, no offence. I like the way Therian Guide works. Not ideal, with lots of freedom of speech but with some obvious boundaries. I like that. Kinda balanced.

The therian community is very important to me as it has helped me make friends that are like me.

(2022-10-28 17:24)limearey Wrote:  

(2022-10-28 16:42)NovaFox Wrote:  If you don't mind me asking, what happened to your back?

my cousin got mad at me for who and what i am and threw a concreat chunk at my back. it damaged a disc in the lumbar part of my back that likes to move around all the time, and gave me minor nerve damage in my legs, and the nerves that lead to the urinary track. i was going to join wrestling, but i was worned aginst it because it has a chance of paralizeing me. but isnt everything a chance like a car hit and running something?? it causes me a lot of pain, and i tried loseing wate to help it, but it made the pain and my balence worse. its sad

Im sorry to hear that happened to you.

(2022-10-28 16:42)NovaFox Wrote:  If you don't mind me asking, what happened to your back?

my cousin got mad at me for who and what i am and threw a concreat chunk at my back. it damaged a disc in the lumbar part of my back that likes to move around all the time, and gave me minor nerve damage in my legs, and the nerves that lead to the urinary track. i was going to join wrestling, but i was worned aginst it because it has a chance of paralizeing me. but isnt everything a chance like a car hit and running something?? it causes me a lot of pain, and i tried loseing wate to help it, but it made the pain and my balence worse. its sad

If you don't mind me asking, what happened to your back?

i used to do this alot until my back injury at 11 y.o., then i did like a crawl version of it so i dont damige the rest of my nerves

It also is painful sometimes. I ran all the way across my house on quads, and it really hurt.

I have to agree with cuddie here. It feels awkward doing it with people around. I also get embarrassed doing it.